Alongside the Dare2bu emails that I receive every day from Deb, I also get a ‘Heart of life’ thought for the day email. A few days ago, I received one that said this:
Sometimes I forget that I’m not in control of the universe and I wear myself out trying to do a job that’s way above my pay grade.
I am really relieved when I remember to just do what’s mine to do and leave running the universe to whoever has that job covered. They are doing a way better job than I ever could!
I don’t remember the exact moment that I knew insightfully that it wasn’t my job to control things. I was brought up going to a church, and being taught about God. In many ways, this has stood me in good stead for being open to hearing and seeing what I do now. So, I have probably believed for a very long time that I am not in control of whether the sun comes up in the morning, or whether trees grow etc. But in more recent years I have really seen this more deeply, to a further degree than just the “big things”. The more I check out this idea that I am not in control, the less it looks like I have anything to do… and I don’t mean this in the sense of I can just sit around doing nothing all day (though, who doesn’t love doing that sometimes!).
What I mean is, let me give you an example….
My younger sister got married in May. It was a beautiful day. We all received wedding ‘favours’ on the table in the afternoon. They were bags of seeds, and a donation made to a charity, in memory of two close family members who had died over the last few years and were missed. In their memory we were asked to plant the seeds over the next month or so to grow flowers. I absolutely love gardening but have never grown anything from seed before. I much prefer to buy a flower in bloom so I know what I am getting! This was going to be a first for me.
I read the instructions, planted the seeds as instructed and over the next few weeks I watered them. That was it, that was all that was mine to do…. And now….
It wasn’t mine to work out when the first sprout would come through the soil, or mine to decide how quickly they would grow, or even mine to know what flowers may (or may not) bloom. As you can see from the picture no flowers have bloomed yet. (As an aside, if anyone has any idea what these might be please let me know!) My point here is a simple one…. Since understanding the principles and knowing that I am not in control, all I ever have to do is what is in front of me to…. Plant the seed, or write this blog, or say Hello and smile to a passer-by. It is never mine to control the universe….. Thank God.